....He watched the half painted face on the wall smile...
His eyes opened to a new morning, white lilies on his table,
The bright yellow tint of the morning sun, streamed his mind,
He watched the half painted face on the wall, blinked his eyes.
The nights spoil, spread under his bed, he could feel the heartbeat,
As he stepped aside to his new day, the face on the wall smiled,
The smile turned to laughter, pride his only emotion.
The spider crawled away, as his hands reached in to the depths,
Depths of his unaltered life, the lips parted in half a smile,
Love, he knew was that which changed the face, the half face.
The lily bloomed, a half white silver petal, fading at its root,
Something had changed from the previous night, spiders in his brain,
The red pool that had formed, reflected his evil self, the passion.
He watched the lily fade away, the white turning to pale rust,
He watched her smile fade away, the sunlight fade into darkness,
The spiders crawl back, as he laid her down, under his bed.
I watched the curtain slide, and the crystal glass window,
As the first light of the dawn flooded my eyes,
I heard the morning prayers, blaring through the speakers,
Promising life, and peace forever.
I had heard the same promise, as I had opened the doors,
The same prayers, did I chant that morning,
My hands felt the trigger, as I steered, my life with my hands,
And the life of the kids who sat with me.
It would fly down, It would come as a surprise, they had said,
Its everywhere, Its here as we speak, they had warned,
I felt a chill run down my spine, as my soul shattered in seven places,
I felt the cold, as the death flew down to me.
The curtain fell, the crystal window shattered, as my eyes closed,
The prayers were said, and peace was forgiven that day,
I heard the cries, and my ears were deafened with the sound,
And the brightness of the promise was all that I saw.
"...How was i different from them?, I thought, I pondered..."
I sat by my table, with a wine glass, half empty,
And on the table were lined seven shells,
Empty, for they had served their purpose,
And as I sat, the seven memories came to life.
The streets were washed in the yellow light,
As I saw him beat her to death, with bare hands,
His eyes burned with furry, and his hands did the deed,
And I emptied my first shell, as he came crashing down.
My sleep couldn't make peace with me, as the children cried,
They cried in heart chilling screams, as I entered the room,
The mother sat there, eating away, as the kids cried to hunger,
And I emptied my second shell, as her blood splattered the wall.
It was the great war, that made us leave our homes,
And I saw the old man push along his son, youth in his prime,
An able bodied man, but he had lost to slumber and laze,
And I emptied my third shell, and he slept for eternities to come.
He was a rich man, and his richness knew no end,
And at the slave market I saw him, I saw him with his little one,
As men quoted price for her tender skin, I saw the mammon in his eyes,
And I emptied my fourth shell, his riches he couldn't take along.
"Why do they love you more?", he screamed as with an ax he charged,
"Why do they not love me the same", and his envious blows found their mark,
His brother lay in a pool of blood as he cleaned the ax,
And I emptied my fifth shell, as he fell next to his brother.
"I am beautiful", She would chirp in every morning,
"My beauty, knows no boundaries", In the evening I would hear her say,
"You are no beauty", she smirked as she crashed acid on her lover's face,
And I emptied my sixth shell, and to dust her beauty was dethroned.
I loved her more than my life, she was my soul, my beloved,
Until I found her with men, men I had never known,
I found her with lust in her eyes, as she satisfied her carnal needs,
And I emptied my seventh shell, as her naked limp body soaked in blood.
And today I sit here, with a half filled glass in my hand,
And the seven empty shells that line my table,
"How was i different from them?", I thought, I pondered,
"Who will judge me?", I thought as I raised the gun to my head.
